Monday, April 5, 2010

The WTF Chronicles Pt 974123: Snakes On My Plane

Saturday night, I decided to venture out with some homies to this little spot out near Midtown. I knew it was more of a chill vibe, so I elected to go super casual. No Polo, no plaid pants, no bowties, just straight sneakers, t-shirt, and fitted hat. I looked nice of course, but still clearly not my usual get-up.

We're all chillin' and drinking having a great time. There weren't a lot of bad chicks in there, but there was more than a handful. I'm not much of a dancer, so I typically post at the bar or chill out on a couch or something. My homeboy and I are just chillin' at the bar ordering drinks. I yell out to the bartender to get me a Patron and pineapple juice. Some grassy knoller dude overhears my drink order. "I ain't never had that is it?" I reply that it's good and that he should give it a shot. Conversation over right? WRONG! He gets his drink and comes over to tell me how much he likes it. He clinks my glass and says cheers. By now I realize that I am in the middle of a potential holla. Oy vey.

We were near Midtown, so I thought okay maybe this kat is a little ghey. I take my hat off to show my face just to show him I'm a chick. Didn't matter, he's still talking to me. I finally get a break when his liquor decides to run through him and he makes a dash to the restroom. My homeboy and I move around. By this time, this little young chick is dancing in front of me. It was a small club, but she had more than enough room to not be backing it up all on me. I chuckled because I thought it was cute.

"Why aren't you on the dance floor?" a voice rang out. It was the bar guy......AGAIN! He kept hinting around dancing. I know he wants to dance with me but I kept playing dumb. My homie and her girlfriend spotted my trapping from across the room. My homie starts dancing with my homeboy and her girlfriend starts dancing near me. I guess dude figured out what time it was and fell back.

I'm not one of those lesbians who get offended when a guy tries to holla. I was a bit perplexed on Saturday because usually when a guy tries to get at me, I'm wearing something that could be "girly" e.g. a Polo shirt and some jeans. Au contraire that night. Now I know a lot of dudes use the "poo at the wall" holla method. Meaning a guy will holla at 20 chicks in one night and just by law of averages, at least one will go for it. I just wish *cute* femmes were more like that. Peace.

Worth mentioning bonus cut: I saw C yesterday. She's gone natural and looks amazing. #lesigh Be cool, Ice Cold.

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