Monday, July 9, 2012

Bridging the Gap With My (Not So) Distant Lover

The countdown to the end of my long distance relationship has started. In just mere hours, my love will make her move to The H. I'm so stoked and excited about us being in the same city. Honestly, I never thought it would come to this. No, no, don't get it twisted. I figured I would end up moving to be with her because I don't really do new friends, so being in a new city wouldn't be so jarring to me.

I think back to when we first decided to be in a relationship. The distance never scared me. I wasn't fond of not being able to hold her after a long day or not being able to tickle her until she exploded in laughter. I didn't care for not being able to take her out for ice cream or go on a Grippo's(those BBQ chips are the TROOF)  run. Never once was I afraid of the miles between us. Truthfully, I was scared of today.

I was afraid that once Rand McNally placed us in the same grid, things wouldn't be the same. It petrified me that either one of us could say "I miss you" and not have to wait weeks till we could do anything about it. Once you take that LD out of LDR, it's a whole new ball game. Silly me, I listened to white noise and read stories of strangers on message boards. It took me a little while to tune the world out and I'm glad I did.

I realize now the distance in the beginning of our relationship built a strong foundation. In an LDR, you become excellent communicators. I can't think of a single thing we cannot talk about. I can't recall going a single day without calling, texting, tweeting, skyping. We used this time to really get to know one another. Not just simple Newlywed Game question answers but real stuff.

We were extremely fortunate to be able to see each other often (thank you buddy pass). A lot of times in LDRs, folk don't see each other often so they feel compelled to be on their best vacation behavior. We farted, had disagreements over Chex Mix, and went to run mundane errands together. We missed each other with that "New Mate Smell". We were ourselves by ourselves.

I'm ready for this next step in our relationship. No fear. No worries. I pray every night this move is successful for her. I know how smart and amazing she is. I want her new co-workers to know this. I want her new friends to know this. I want the whole metro to know this. She didn't make this move for me but I'm gonna do everything in my power to make this move pleasant for her...and US. Welcome to Houston, baby...I luh you. Peace.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Butthurt Black Bicyclist Take 1

This entry started as a joke between my girlfriend and me, but I think it may be a good idea for a series. Coupled with the fact I haven't blogged in a looooong time, it's a no-brainer.

My newest love is bicycling. For the last couple months, I've been on two wheels making it do what it do. I figured it would just be a way to get some exercise in. Never did I think I'd enjoy cycling so much. Each day, I'm thinking of new ways to get faster or to go harder. You're probably thinking to yourself "oh this is all peachy keen, where's the butthurt, LI?".

This installment is about riding gear. Any serious cyclist knows that it starts with the clothes. Spandex and lycra and all that good stuff is wonderful when you're 5'7 and 130 lbs. Looks great. However, for the stockier cyclist, these fabrics can leave you a bit self conscious. Cycling gear is form fitting, so whether a jersey is a L or 5X, it's gonna hug all your curves and swerves....DEAL WITH IT. If you can't handle a bigger person in some tight biking shorts, close your eyes.  Idiots in cars and idiots walking may or may not say something ignant to you. You keep right on chuggin' along.

What's crazy is that I've read msg boards where folk where worried about what fellow cyclists will say/think. Cyclists are notorious for being vain. They shave every string of hair off their bodies. They obsess over having the best shorts, flashiest jerseys, so on and so forth. However, cyclists are typically oblivious. Meaning, don't be afraid to let it hang while you pedal away to take off inches and possibly save your life.

My tip for self conscious riders: stay away from bright colors. Black shorts and maybe blue or green jerseys will let you blend a big. Also, if you're worried about thick thighs or just generally uncomfortable with biking shorts, you can buy baggy shorts or simply wear some basketball shorts over your tighties. Lastly, beware of's real! Otherwise, pedal on and watch that weight slide off. Peace.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Freestyle Friday: Spring Forward Edition

Act like you know: I ramble, you read. Ready...break!

* Been sporting this 3-0 for a couple weeks now, so far so good.

* Each day I fall more in love with my girlfriend. Some days are really hard with the distance but just hearing her voice puts this smile on my face that I can't wipe off. And don't even get me started on how much of a blessing Skype is.

* Major major big time things on the horizon for me. This will be a springboard for sure.

* Really can't clap to March Madness this year. Maybe it's the lack of upsets (so far) or maybe it's not as fun when you're not watching games at work. Football where are you?

* I have to remind myself that my other sister is ignant. I hate that I let myself get bent out of shape over some foolishness she said to me. I must realize that not everyone is as ridiculous as her.

* The story about Trayvon Martin gets to me. I read a lot of news, but this story just sticks with me. Maybe because I think of my oldest nephew who will be a teen soon. Minority life seems to have no value in the US.

* That Audi S4 is way too tough. It will be my next car. Don't like that it's not available with a V8, but I can live with a V6.

* Lately, I've gotten into The First 48. It's sad and fascinating at the same time. Sad because 99.9998 of the murders are over some really dumb stuff. Also it's always a minority victim and perp. We gotta stop the violence, for real.

* God is good. I'm so thankful where He's brought me and excited about where He's taking me.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

No Collection Plate Will Be Passed Around for This One

God is amazing. Each day I'm more and more amazed at His power and wisdom. The past few months have had some really rough patches, but I'm still determined to trust Him and stand on the promises of His word.The way God operates shows that He has a sense of humor. You pray for one area of your life and he blesses you in a totally different area. God knows exactly what we need and when we need it. Even if we don't think we need it or even want it.

A few months ago, I was pretty upset. I saw people getting things they wanted and here I was praying, believing, tithing, the whole nine. Seemed like they were doing things with little effort. Then I realized that some people's journeys are less difficult because that's as good as it will get for them. Not saying that's a bad thing, but I know the things I'm believing God for aren't of the garden variety. It's easier to trust and believe God for turkey franks than it is to trust and believe for a porterhouse steak.

Each morning I have been making a sacrifice in order to be closer to God. To really yield myself to what He wants to reveal to me. Praying for discernment. Praying for the ability to tune out myself and the world and listen to Him. I can feel that I'm on the verge of some amazing things. I know that God is working out some things that just a year ago, I couldn't fathom happening for me.

My advice to you out there reading this is to trust God. Ask that His will be done in your life. Forgive all who have wronged you. Forgive yourself. Even if you can only study your Bible for 3 minutes, give God that full 3 minutes of your undivided attention. The more you seek Him, the more you will long to learn more about Him. No matter what you're going through, God hasn't forgotten about you. Stand firm. Peace.

Friday, March 2, 2012

Born Day Musings and Reflections

As I laid in bed late last night, I thought back on how when I was younger I felt 30 was so old. Then, the clock struck midnight and there I was. I waited for my hair to turn gray, a hump to form, even a slight change in my vision. Didn't happen. All I felt was gratitude and optimism.

My roaring 20s had some terrible times. I experienced some of the lowest of the lows but I never wanted to be anything other than alive. I didn't make millionaire status; however, I feel like I'm definitely on the path to making my dreams a reality. I lost my mother and while it almost crushed me, I drew upon her love and strength to pull through. I wish she could be here to see the woman that I became and the person that I am becoming.

On the flip side, there were countless numbers of beautiful and amazing things that happened to me in my 20s. I finished university on the 4 year plan. Worked for some top notch corporations. Started my own company. Welcomed more nieces and nephews into the world. Developed a new and fresher relationship with my father. Discovered the joys of single malt scotch. Saw the Knicks make the playoffs with a non sub .500 record. Fell in love. There are numerous other things, but this is a blog, not a manifesto.

So to my 30s and beyond, I welcome you with open arms. I look forward to all you have to offer. I look forward to making major strides in the ever evolving process in getting to where I want to be. I look forward to being wiser, stronger, healthier, more focused, more faithful, and any other superlative that will assist in me along the way. Cheers to my 20s, and here's to the next chapters. Peace.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Taking a Page From the Ultimate Playbook

It's amazing how good God is; I marvel at how he places people, words, etc in our paths exactly when we need it. Yesterday's word at church was "Be Encouraged". Last week was rough and overall, these last 6 months have had some less than stellar moments. God knew I needed to hear that and I'm glad I did.

Last night, I was laying in bed and a huge smile came over my face. I could hear my mother saying one of her favorite phrases..."Hallelujah Anyhow". That was my mother's go-to phrase. No matter how bad any situation she was facing was, she would always lift up her hands and say hallelujah anyhow. I knew at that moment that all is going to be more than well. If my mother, while her body was being eaten by cancer, could still find the wherewithal to praise Him anyhow , surely I can do the same in less dire straits.

My mother prayed and prayed and prayed some more. She had faith for things that she will never physically see. Even if I never prayed in my life, I'd be living off the prayers my mother prayed. The way she prayed, my children will be living off the prayers their grandmother prayed. We got reserves like the 10th man off the bench.

After that epiphany, I'm fully adopting my mother's mantra. I know it won't be easy because that level of faith and trust takes discipline. Shoot, we can't praise Him when we stub our toe sometimes. However, it can be done and I know the results are going to be amazing. Peace.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Bob, Solo, Raising, Springs Eternal Aren't the Only Hope

I hope that so far I've been a great girlfriend to you. I hope that I've treated you with the utmost respect. I hope that I've shown you kindness and affection. I hope that my words have been truthful even if they haven't always been sweet. I hope that when you think of your future, I'm right there beside you.

I hope that you are thankful that all the ones before me didn't work out. I hope you are thankful that all the ones before you didn't work out. I hope you know how lucky you are and how luckier I am. I hope that you know that I think about you all the time. I hope you know that some days I'm scared. Not scared of losing you, but scared of not being everything you need, want, and desire of me.

I hope that you know that I will go to bat for you. I hope that you know that I'll guard your heart like Fort Knox. I hope you know that you can trust me with your fears and your insecurities knowing that I wouldn't dare use them against you. I hope you know that you can trust me with all your dreams, goals, aspirations knowing that I will support them as if they were my own.

I hope you think of this distance not as an obstacle but as an opportunity to get to know each other on a deeper level. I hope that you know while these miles suck, we're building a foundation that won't be shaken even by light years.

I hope you know that I don't have all the answers. I hope you know that I don't have a manual on being the best girlfriend ever. I hope you know how awesome and beautiful you are. I hope you know how much you mean to me. I hope you know that I love you....scratch that, let me tell you...I love you. Peace.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

I Shouldn't Had Left You Without a Dope Blog to Read Through

All late and stuff, but Merry New Year! It has been a long time since I blogged, but good things come to those who wait and all that jazz. Since I can't pick one topic to jump back in with, I'll just ramble and make it work.

The relationship - Things are going quite well. Rosalita and I spent close to a month together all over these United States. Finally got that first disagreement out of the way. I need to work on my disagreement skills. I've always been the type to choose to drop it rather than risk having a blow-up. I'm learning that getting upset isn't a bad thing. Even in the best of relationships, there's bound to be heated discussions.

She's so loving and supporting. I know that she has my back at all times. There's nothing good she wants for herself that she doesn't want for me. It's so amazing what you find when you're not looking. This distance blows but it has allowed us to really get to know one another and build a solid foundation.

Kwanzaa - I've never celebrated it in my life, heck I really didn't know anything about it. Rosalita's family not only celebrates it but basically runs the city wide celebrations. I thought it was hella sexy watching her lead the various celebrations. I learned quite a bit and I will say the emancipation bread is frickin' delicious.

Now I wouldn't be me if I didn't go there: TONS of bohos at the celebrations. You know the "answer the phone with 'peace', Egyptian musk wearing, incense #9 burning, swine is the debil, poetry spittin', so Afrocentric our kids have to be homeschooled" types. Don't get me wrong I love being black and all that good stuff, but the bohos take it way too far. My eyes swelled with tears of joy when I saw this boho chick with her white boyfriend.

What I learned over my Christmas vacation:

* I will have to find another airline for my visits to Ohio. Southwest flew me all over the world. Why fly me to the east coast to get to the Midwest?

* I'm a sulker. I knew I had a hard time hiding disdain, but I wasn't aware I sulked. Working on it.

* Baby drag queens are blockers. LOL.

* Old folks dip out after the champagne toast on New Years. Full crowd at 11:30 pm and crickets at 12:17 am.

* You can actually get decent Mexican food in the WHA served by real Mexicans.

Any resolutions, LI? Nope. I'm just gonna continue to have faith and trust God in all aspects of my life. If I do that, I will be blessed immensely in all ventures, relationships, and endeavors. Peace.