Wednesday, February 10, 2010

You're My Bad Habit But I Have to Give You Up

I have been in a relationship for about 15 years. The first few years were pretty casual, we saw each other here and there. Both unsure of what it could become. I was young and apprehensive. I really didn't know what I was getting myself into. I decided that I would take a step back and give myself time to grow and mature.

In 1997, I reconnected with my former flame. Things got really intense. With every passing day, I found myself falling deeper and harder. I blocked out every unpleasant thought. I charged on towards our goal of being champions of this here game. I pressed and trapped anything or anyone who tried to dissuade me from my love. I ran 94 at the speed of love.

Four years later, things started to get dicey. My love had mutated into some albatross that I could not recognize. Back in the day, my sweetie was passionate, sharing, and we worked as a team. Now my dear had become selfish, lethargic, and just plain bad. My love had began associating with shady people. People who promised to help make them better but only ended up leaving them worse than before.

All this time I have hung in there. I've seen their highest highs and I believe now I see their lowest lows. I always admonished people who stayed in bad relationships. Now it is my turn to look in the mirror. My babe has hurt and disappointed me to no end. Every time I think we've turn a corner, they fall right back into their bad habits. I've invested too much time, money, and energy into this situation.

Nine years is a long time to endure such an unfulfilling relationship. As much as it pains me to walk away, I must. My friends have ridiculed me to no end. I am tired of defending our relationship. I gotta do this for me. Maybe one day when you're better, we can be together again. Right now.....I just can't. We had a good run, long my love. Peace.

No comments: