Perhaps I am stuck in the past. When I dated dudes, I didn't have to approach them even though I didn't mind doing so. I always felt that if you are interested to let a person know. Squeaky wheel gets the grease. Now by approaching I don't mean running up to a dude and kickin' him some lines. I'm talking about letting it be known I was interested.
Nowadays, I'm on the other side of that card. I am expected to be the approacher. I don't like it one bit. Do I have a crippling fear of rejection? Nope. My fear of rejection is no higher than the "average" person. I have two reasons why I don't typically approach women.
1. I don't pick up on subtlety.........at ALL. If you're feelin' me, it would behoove you to come say hey or something. You don't have to mack me. You don't have to buy me a drink. If you give me a big enough clue that you want me to chat you up, I will. Your work is done.......I will take it from there. If you're sitting over there blinking your eyes and batting your eyelashes..........I'll assume that your contacts are dry and possibly point you to the nearest Walgreens.
2. If I am the aggressor in the beginning, it's setting a precendent that I may not or do not want to live up to. Am I saying I'm submissive and timid? No. Am I saying that I cannot take charge of a situation? No. Aggressive is one word you will probably never hear anyone use to describe me. I'm saying that for the most part I want to chill out in the cut. I will make decisions, kill that bug crawling on the wall, and protect her the best way I can (provided she's not out poppin' off at the mouth for no good reason). However, I want her to make decisions, kill that bug crawling on the floor, and protect me the best way she knows how.
Long story short, approaching should be a mutual thing. One person should put their ego aside and make interest known. The other person should put their reservations aside and build upon the shown interest. Back to reality..........that won't happen. Hey, just get it how you live. Peace.