Monday, July 19, 2010

You Done Tore Your Draws

What better way to get back in the swing of things by posting a world famous "Lezzies are Crazy" type blog? Peep game.

I am fully convinced that 86% of women have no clue of what they want. There's a chick I know, let's call her Rock City. Rock City and I met a few years back.....years ago when I wasn't as versed in crazy woman speak and lezzie lingo. I guess I had been lucky in my early ghey years because the chicks I dealt with had one face and didn't speak out of both ends of the mouths. Anywho, I digress. From jump, I thought Rock City was pretty cool.

Eventually, she confessed she had a girlfriend, but in her words were in the process of breaking up. There's my green showing right there, silly me to think breaking up really meant breaking up. We would do lunch and chit chat and kee-kee....hell I even bought this chick flowers. I call myself being there for her whilst she went through her "break up". Long story short, Santa and the Easter Bunny shot dice in my bedroom before she broke up with her girl.

Smarten up, Nas.....I did and put her back in the box where she belonged. We kept it cool and casual. I do my thing, she kept doing her relationship thing. Fast forward about a month or so ago, she asks me "LaconicIcon, if I was single, would you be my girlfriend" #needlescratchesrecord #brakesscreech I ask where did this come from and I tell her that we would have to hang out to see if I still liked her.

A couple weeks after that, I'm at the spot with my homies. I get a text talking from Rock City about why am I acting funny style and that she knows I see her. Lo and behold, she's at the spot. After some texts and my homie calling her out, she comes over to the table. She announces that she's single and I am woman hear me roar and all that good chest beating type stuff. Meanwhile, I'm sittin' back with the "o rly" face because I've seen this movie play out before.

Against my better judgement, we start hanging out pretty tough. As time went on, the hanging out got more sporadic. The calls got shorter. The text messages became non existent. It didn't take a Rhode's scholar to figure out what happened: she got back with her ex.

Now that would be fine and dandy except she felt the need to hit me with a Dear Jane letter. All that wasn't needed with me. I didn't go into this situation expecting anything except for a some chill time and hopefully some booty (hey let's keep it funky). So since we were on this honesty kick, I decided to lay all my cards out. I let her know that I find her intriguing and that I respect her decision. That should be the end of it, right? WRONG!

This chick goes back to talk to my homie and made it seem like I was still sweating her after she told me to kick rocks. That got me mad tight because that's ridiculous. I hate when folks try to make themselves seem like the martyr. My purpose of telling how I felt was to just get it all out there, she can't ever say that my feelings were unclear. These chicks definitely need to get a ladder and get over themselves.

Her draws are torn with me and her ass is flappin' in the wind. I wish her well. I wouldn't sweat a chick in a sauna. #ontothenextone

No comments: